How do i change my severley depressing life circumstances- is it to late- is it over ?

i'm now 3o years old- ive aged physically- im bald, ive had a horrendously traumaqtic life and ive missed out on being employed, having ' any ' relationships basically everything, education, qualifications never happened etc.





1) i have borderline personality disorder and ptsd.





2) i live in a small one bedroom flat, i own no possessions except a computer....i live on sickness welfare.





3) ive lived on my own for 3 years - never been employed - never made any relationships in life with either gender.





4) ive been refered for therapy and have to wait.





5) i have a long mental health past, record %26amp; a minor criminal one going back 8 years.





6) dont have any social support network except a few online friends %26amp; parents who can be domineering at times and who ive not always gotten along with.





7) i have physical worries : frequent urination, aching joints that are weak - cracking in the skin on the head of my penis - waiting to see a dermatologist.





8) i have physical imperfections.

How do i change my severley depressing life circumstances- is it to late- is it over ?
no offence but you seem to be wanting to change a lot at once. How about a list of achievable goals first? Like maybe first one is getting to the job centre and having a chat about getting back into work...and I'm not being funny or 'out but being at work keeps your mind off worries and it makes you meet people. Maybe a job where you are in contact with people all the time and you can get to know just general people before you get onto another goal.


Also the whole wife thing....many men never get that lucky so maybe change that to a meaningful strong relationship.


It will happen. Most people would wait a lifetime for their soul mate.


Also if you wanna meet christian people get to church. If you cannot get a job there is always committees and little odd jobs that need doing. Find a church with people your age.


Hope that helps


Good luck


Just aim lower and work up very very gradually.





p.s. have you thought about a pet too. I lived for my cats before i met my husband. They are so wonderful. Worth thinking about. I think someone like PDSA would help keep vets costs down. Worth investigating?
Reply:SNAP


i've been depressed for 23 years!!!


but i managed to have a family %26amp; a 'fairly' happy life


i have 4 kids, one of which has autism


husband has narcolepsy


got a mouthy 14 yr old who thinks he's 21


got a 5 month old


having problems getting our son into a special school as the local authority are being difficult





P.S puerperrul psychosis is a 'mental illness' that only affects women after they've had a baby.....look that up, it HEAVY 5hite!!





always remember:


theres always someone somewhere who's worse off than yourself....FACT
Reply:Please explain to me more about borderline personality disorder as I am uneducated about it.





Just a thought but have you tried voluntary work you can choose what hours and days you work and it is a kind of gentle way of easing yourself into the working environment plus you can also be placed somewhere where people are more sympathetic to your needs.





Take care of yourself
Reply:hi.





sorry but this time i am going to be harsh.





a VERY similar question from you had its best answer chosen a couple of days back I think.





So what is it?





a) you are hoping for a miracle


b) you are a troll and have nothing better to do


c) you are too afraid to do anything





Which is it then? if its a) then you better kill yourself coz miracles don't happen on their own. if its b) then get lost and get a life and if its c) well done on WANTING the change.. but you ARE going to have to do more than keep posting this question over and over in here.





Good luck
Reply:Be content in yourself and don't strive for happiness


Happiness is elusive


Life will take a turn for the better
Reply:welcome to the culture of despair
Reply:can you narrow it down a bit ?
Reply:Your first question is the best phrased one:





How do i change my severley depressing life circumstances?





One change at a time and one day at a time. This is not a 12 step program - this is a many-step program that will last the rest of your life. Work each and every day at a goal or multiple goals, but take ONE at a time.
Reply:Start by reading or listening to anything written by Anthony Robbins. He was a big loser who turned his life around, and he teaches other people how to do the same.
Reply:with hope there IS a future and at least you have this try and keep a little more upbeat and your life will surely change but it take practice and whistleing a happy tune and looking on the bright side will always bring positive results but you have to make your mind up to be happy and change things for yourself make this your mantra